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Joke of the Day

"I lost my party bot 2000 I'm sure it'll turn up though"

"Why did the Naval Inspector fail the submarine? Because he found it to be SUB-standard."

"Want to know a 100% effective form of birth control? Abortion 0_o"

"Woke up 4 times to pee last night And each time only a little came out, my night of sleep was piss-poor"

"Why are the Dutch such great bakers? They know their way around an oven..."

"What did the Japanese man say to the hooker? You might feel a tiny prick."

"If one door closes and another door opens, then probably your in a jail."

"I lost my thesaurus when I was little... I couldn't find the words to describe how I felt."

"Most people prefer quilts over duvets but you shouldn't make blanket statements."

"Marriage advice for dummies: Five worst things you can do5 Abandon4 Lie3 Cheat2 Abuse1 Forget to start the dishwasher"