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Joke of the Day

"Marriage advice for dummies: Five worst things you can do5 Abandon4 Lie3 Cheat2 Abuse1 Forget to start the dishwasher"

"I'm thinking about buying a greyhound, don't know what the wife is going to say so I'll run it by her first."

"""UK Students Die In Safari Crash"" I bet they wished they'd just stuck with Internet Explorer now."

"My uncle is a toilet inspector. He's seen some shit."

"Of all the millions and trillions of literary devices, hyperbole is my favorite."

"Damn, you know you're getting old when you get up in the morning and have to rest for awhile"

"Do Wilma Flintstone got a booty? She yabba-dabba dooooooo!"

"Why does the Necromancer hate doing stand-up comedy? He always has a dead audience"

"I once went to an all you can eat bakery in France. It was a painful experience."

"Why is it so easy to trust a hypochondriac? Because none of their plans are ill-conceived."