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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between a degree in Theoretical Physics and a theoretical degree in Physics? One is relevant and can get you a job. The other you went to university for."

"*wakes up* well, it looks like its that time again. time to do just enough activity to convince my body that it needs to go back to sleep"

"Life is like a shit sandwich... The more bread you have the less shit you have to eat."

"[Rappers job interview] Boss: What is your biggest weakness? Me: My rhyme game is weak. I can't speak. I'm a geek. Birds have feathers."

"What's the difference between an Nvidia card and an AMD card? One empties your pocket. The other makes Hot Pockets."

"*Cinderella drops her glass slipper* Prince: I have a girlfriend."

"What is the title of the new Vietnamamese cookbook ? 100 way to wok your dog."

"When do virgin guys get some ass ? when their fingers go through the toilet paper"

"I used to be impatient.... ... I just don't have the time anymore."

"Gaining weight when you are still owing me money is a sign of disrespect"