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Joke of the Day

"Only 90s kids will remember this (picture of burning buildings in Sarajevo) Wait wait no (picture ofmass graves in Bosnia) Wait no. Hold on"

"[casting call] -have u acted before? *shows VHS of me at a food court eating free samples like I might purchase the meal -oh this guys good"

"I was going to say a StarFox joke But they were all too Corneria"

"customers who viewed SHIMMERING LIGHTS OUTSIDE THEIR WINDOWS, also viewed THEIR FEET HELPLESSLY MOVING TOWARDS THE DARKNESS OF THE WOODS"

"Have you heard the one about the misaddressed letter? You might not get it."

"Every time someone tells a bulimia joke... Every time someone tells a bulimia joke I throw up in disgust. Please keep them coming."

"(Possible nsfw)Adam was watching Eve.... Masturbate with a fish. God said, great now I'm never gonna get the smell out!"

"A police body camera is like Pokemon GO for catching criminals Mostly because it never seems to work properly"

"What are you if you hide eggs at nice places eggspert."

"The sign of a true gentleman... ...is one who knows how to play the bagpipes, but chooses not to."