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Joke of the Day

"Why did the Star Wars movies come out in the sequence 4, 5, 6, 1, 2, 3? Because in charge of sequence, Yoda was."

"How do you greet a racist murderer? Good morning officer ."

"ME: *does entire national anthem with armpit farts* WIFE: see what I mean? THERAPIST: Mmmhmm *writes in notes: ""she's nuts. This guy rules*"

"The poster for a Homeless shelter's charity orchestra night reads... Come on down to the shelter and blow some Oboes!"

"What goes up and never comes down? Your age!"

"What do you call corn with a sense of humor? Laughing stalk"

"What's the difference between tuna, glue and a piano? You can tuna piano but you can't piano tuna!"

"What's the difference between pussy and parsley? People actually eat pussy.."

"Think About It... What do you call a grizzly bear with no teeth?"

"I was in the supermarket when I got a message on my phone telling me there were 24 singles in my area Think I'm going to delete the Kraft Cheese app."