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Joke of the Day

"I'm 32. I don't have haters. I have too much debt and teeth that shifted from not wearing a retainer."

"Knock knock. Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke."

"Why were the proctologist's emails so hard to read? Too many colons."

"How do you know when your sister is on her period? When your dad's dick tastes like blood.."

"My moral compass must run on solar power because it never seems to work after dark."

"Why don't cannibals eat clowns? They taste funny."

"My dog is so excited about me washing the car that I'm starting to think he borrows it while I'm asleep"

"Why does the French Military install rearview mirrors on their tanks? So that they can see the battle."

"Remember how you used to love getting all new school supplies and now you just steal them from the office?"

"""Honey, remember our first date?"" ""Awh, are you planning something for Valentine's?"" ""No, I forgot my password. It's the security question."""