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Joke of the Day

"Knock knock. Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke."

"If an honest man says he has to use the bathroom He's full of shit."

"Why couldn't the Japanese guy see his car? Because he had a cataract!"

"[date] Me: you wanna see what desserts they have? Wife: how about we go home & I'll let you- Me [calls waiter]: what desserts do u have?"

"ME: honey, it's really muggy out today WIFE: if I go outside & all our mugs are on the front lawn, I'm leaving u ME: *sips coffee from bowl*"

"What do you call a black man on the moon?... A problem. 2 black men on the moon? A bigger problem. All the black men on the moon? Problem solved!"

"What's the difference between a surgeon and God? God knows he's not a surgeon."

"My ex was gang raped by a troupe of mime artists. They performed unspeakable acts on her."

"Did you hear about the iguana that couldn't mate in captivity? He had a reptile disfunction."

"Be careful when you ROFL! I once heard a joke in a scissor factory... It left me in stitches."