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Joke of the Day

"Knock knock. Who's there? Dishes. Dishes who? Dishes a bad joke."

"What do you call shy bladder incidents? Frozen pees"

"Magic Johnson own everything, movies, gyms, restaurants, sports teams! What kind of aids he got? Financial aids?!?!"

"Me: *passes ransom note* Mom: 2 bags of unmarked cookies? Me: Or you'll never see the cat alive! Mom: He's behind you. Me: STUPID KITTY!"

"Menstruation is NOT a laughing matter. Period."

"Why are DJ's called 'radio personalities' ? Because if they had the looks they'd be on TV."

"A terrorist walks into a pet store and says ""You have 5 minutes to get out of here...I'm going to blow myself up."" Tortoise : Dafuq :-/"

"My wife wanted me to buy something that goes to 200 in one second flat. So I bought her a bathroom scale."

"Studies show that woman are better drivers. Sike!"

"I have now been sober for eighteen months. Not in a row..."