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Joke of the Day

"What did Joan Rivers say to the zombie? *Who are you wearing?*"

"Whats long, green, and smells like pork? Kermit's finger."

"What is the biggest compliment you can pay at a gay bar? Pushing in somebody's stool."

"How do you stop a Polish tank? Shoot the guy that's pushing it"

"Don't get me wrong I'm impressed by the Olympics but what really impresses me is people who sleep with their cell phones in other rooms."

"My superpower is making people laugh. Which would be great if I was trying to be funny."

"So my dyslexia makes it hard for me to take public transportation and... ...oops. Sorry. Wrong bus."

"Do you know what the difference is between toilet paper and a shower curtain? Oh. So it's you then."

"A racist joke What's the difference between a sperm and a racist? A sperm as a 1 in a million chance of actually becoming a human being."

"What do you call a road that doesn't care about anyone? A psycho-path."