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Joke of the Day

"A man walks into a bar... ""A man walks into a bar and the bartender says""... ...""Stop speaking in third person Jaqen"""

"What do you call a three-humped camel? Pregnant."

"I don't know what my wife is most upset about today. The fact that she caught me having sex with her mother this morning or the fact that her mother died during her sleep last night."

"Chain link fence gates will have their revenge on speeding 80s getaway cars."

"The early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese."

"American Ginny Thrasher won gold in the Olympic shooting contest. When asked where she learned her skills ""in school"" she replied."

"You know why those automatic sensor sinks save water? Because none of them fucking work"

"Why do they want to change the faces on dollars but not on coins? Because the only constant is change."

"what do you call a young, green Pumpkin for Halloween? A premature e-Jack-O'-Lantern."

"Where do the most murders occurr in a super market? The cereal aisle"