105708

Joke of the Day

"My wife is so much more attractive without having glasses on. That's why I always take mine off when I get home from work!"

"""Fuck unions!"" he furiously typed... On his day off."

"Meanwhile, in an alternate universe where the Nazi's empire reaches to all four corners of the universe... They've become a Reichtangle."

"Either Chewbacca is in the next stall or someone needs to start adding green leafy vegetables to their diet."

"I sat down beside this guy in a diner, every time he went to take a bite of his sandwich I'd say nomnomnom. He left. Making friends is hard."

"I bought a beehive to start my beekeeping company I thought it was a good bees nest"

"You can't make everyone happy. You aren't a jar of Nutella."

"Why did Newton's wife got pregnant? Because he doesn't believe in using quantum"

"What is a Jewish person's favorite job? A lox-smith"

"You know why Trump fans are called Trumpettes? You only have to learn how to press three buttons, and then you can play 'em all day."