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Joke of the Day
"What is the best way to stop a politician? A really strong gust of wind."
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"What's the difference between a happy person and ET? A happy person has a light heart and ET has a heart light"
"How does a Korean walk a dog? With a little bit of oil."
"Bowling is the perfect activity when I'm in the mood to stick my fingers in disease-ridden holes, but your mom is unavailable."
"thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 20 min before I realized I was just watching a homeless man yell at a pigeon"
"Kind of a pick up line? I wrote you a song but it's only one verse... But it's only because you're my UNIVERSE ...lol..."
"I tried taking Viagara the other day... I must not have swallowed it fast enough, because man oh man was my neck stiff!"
"How many Deadheads does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just watch it burn out and follow it around for 30 years."
"Some people say I have my mom's eyes... but since they can't find them they've never been able to prove it in a court of law."
"History Trivia: In many photographs of Hitler,a golden retriever wearing a Nazi uniform can be seen. This is notorious war criminal Herr Bud"