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Joke of the Day

"If Reddit users were Military Weapons... They would be Attention-Seeking Missles."

"Hi everyone, are you all alright? No, you are all al-left."

"The best thing about being an accountant is that everyone assumes you're not a psychopath."

"Last night my wife started calling me Jeb Bush. I also pull out way to late."

"Wanna hear a joke about blimps? It'll never fly."

"Why does the doctor spank the baby after birth? To knock the dicks off the dumb ones."

"How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2 but how did they get in there?"

"What do you call a little Mexican? A paragraph. Because he's not quite an essay."

"My bank has informed me that Twitter followers can not be used as collateral for a car loan. You guys are useless."

"Did you hear about the new corduroy pillows? They're making headlines everywhere!!"