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Joke of the Day

"Good news and Bad news wife: i have a good news and a bad new. Husband: i am very busy.Just give me good news. wife: The airbags worked properly in our new BMW."

"I wonder how many other Sandy's have come into men's lives and taken their cars and houses, too."

"Most populated places in the world: 1. China 2. India 3. United States 4. Indonesia 5. Friend Zone 6. Hell"

"Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because it was dead."

"They say if your erection lasts... They say if your erection lasts more than 4 hours that you should call a doctor... I say you should tell your wife to call some friends!"

"One of my terrorist friends decided to bomb our only good coffee machine in all of Yemen... Pissed as hell, he said he hates french press"

"*sees a cat yawning* How the hell can you be tired?"

"A closed mouth keeps it's teeth."

"You guys hear about the new Lebron James phone? It only vibrates, it doesn't have a ring."

"The older Cameron Diaz gets, the more she and Mickey Rourke look like brothers."