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Joke of the Day

"One of my terrorist friends decided to bomb our only good coffee machine in all of Yemen... Pissed as hell, he said he hates french press"

"There have been reports of very heavy shelling...... At the peanut factory."

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - King Kong Barbie ...six foot tall ape holding Barbie doll dressed like Fae Rae"

"You have to love a boss with a sense of humor. Mine just sent me a 7am meeting notice on Outlook and I've never laughed so hard..."

"My car starts to hydroplane. I let go & whisper, ""Do it. Become the plane you've always dreamed of. I love you."" *Soft kiss*"

"What's strong enough for a man but made for a woman? The back of my hand."

"You ever feel like you just don't really understand anything, and then your hands turn into flippers and you realize you're a dolphin?"

"I stopped doing topical humor People were getting tired of jokes about ointment."

"The Holy Liar A: ""I dont trust in god."" B: ""You're an atheist? :o"" A: ""No, i think he's a liar."""

"Just saw a French footballer playing Nintendo Think it was Thierry on Wii"