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Joke of the Day

"What did the number zero say to the number 8? I like your belt"

"How many anti-social teens does it take to ignore a burned-out light bulb? None of your fuckin business!"

"what does Voldemort call his prostitutes Whorecruxes"

"Robin Williams tried to give me a high-five the other day but I just left him hanging"

"Whenever someone says ""you know who you are,"" I always wonder if it's me and I don't realize it."

"What do you call it when a hooker farts? A prostitoot."

"If you are bored I recommend mass texting all of your exes ""I'm ready to give it another shot"" and then get ready for the ride of your life"

"Don't make jokes about 9/11... they're just plane wrong."

"You said I could have my way with you. If you didn't want me to experiment with gas and fire, you should've been more specific."

"I love when my friends start selling weight loss shakes because that's one less person I ever have to talk to again."