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Joke of the Day

"""Balls."" said the queen. The king laughed, he had to."

"What do you call it when the Russian president sits on a box of crackers? Putin on the Ritz~"

"Why aren't there any black magicians? Because magic is stupid."

"I can deal with shootings and police harassment. But it's January 4th and some maniac is playing Christmas music. Time to leave the ghetto"

"What's E.T short for? His little legs."

"wait did that Australian guy say ""meteorite"" or ""mate are ya alright?"" *gets hit by a meteorite* ""hey mate are ya alri... no you're dead*"

"Yo momma so fat She has a hard time breathing and walking because of her obesity."

"Have you seen the joke about the carpenter that had to fix a fence? I believe it was a repost"

"What would I do if Future tried talking to me? I'd autotune him out. :)"

"Me: Here you go. Her: WTF? Me: It's the genital mold you wanted. Her: I said gelatin mold! Me: *waddles away with pants around ankles*"