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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Joan Crawford and an abortion doctor ? When Joan used a coat-hanger on Cheryl, she was already out of the womb."

"How do yo get to Sesame Street? Unzip my pants and ask big bird"

"My friend is really into that show Arrow He's a real Arrow-head"

"got so drunk last night that I ate a salad"

"The Dress Joke ""Did you hear about that blue and black dress?"" ""No, what about it?"" ""Turns out it was white and gold."" ""Oh thaaat one."""

"How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? to get to the other side."

"*breaks into your house at night* *finds your bedroom* *blows on you til you wake up* HI I'M CHET CAN I INTEREST YOU IN A SECURITY SYSTEM?"

"Why did the puppy get away with committing murder? ...He had paws-able deniability."

"Stupid Joke I'd like to name my kid buoyancy, but whatever floats your boat."

"Trying to assemble a team of superhero sex offenders. We definitely need the Flash."