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Joke of the Day
"I illegally download music, but only Metallica. They seem to be pretty cool about it."
Next Joke
"What do I look for in a girl? Well she has to be hot. And well-rounded. And cheesy. Extra guac. Wait, wrong list, this is my Chipotle order."
"If the Fresh Prince owned an airline, what would it be called? BelAir"
"I had a racist incident in my kitchen today.... The black bean soup started dissing the white cream sauce, I finally told them both to simmer down."
"Why does the Easter Bunny hide the eggs? Because he doesn't want anybody to know that he's been fucking chickens!"
"When accused by a woman a man's first instinct is to deny. We're not lying, we're just buying time to remember what you're talking about..."
"If you don't like the news, go out and make some."
"Why are black people always wrong? They have no rights."
"How do you get an elephant into a Safeway bag? You take the f out of ""safe"" and the f out of ""way""."
"M&Ms should change their packaging. They should make it a white wrapper."