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Joke of the Day

"Why do girls always go in threes when using the restroom? Because they can't even."

"Why don't any pirates live in Kansas? Because they all live in *Ar*kansas."

"Him: Can I have a bite of your dessert? Me: I think we should see other people."

"How do you fix a woman's watch? You don't. There is a clock on the oven."

"I wonder if mormons support the transgendered? If they did, they could go on a transmission! -- authentic dadjoke overheard at breakfast"

"What do you call a fuzzy animal that grows on trees? A root bear! (I came up with this joke a few minutes ago. I hope it's funny)"

"Sales clerk: That handbag is very pleasing to the eye. Customer: Really? I don't like it. Giant Disembodied Eye: YOU REALLY SHOULD BUY IT"

"A man walked into a bar Ouch!"

"I don't eat some foods. -vagueans"

"Two thieves try to steal a calendar. They each got six months."