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Joke of the Day

"How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Three: one to hold the bulb, and two to spin the first one around."

"what i don't understand is that a pope can choose his own name but there's never been a Pope Batman"

"If you were a stand-up comic, and you're doing a show for a family at a funeral. What would you're opening line be? Like outrageous, dark, funny whatever let's hear!"

"What does a tornado and a redneck divorce have in common? In the end, someone is going to lose a trailer."

"Actually told a girl who's moving to France soon that ""there's lots of French people over there"". It's a wonder how I can even bathe myself."

"What did the right eye say to the left? There's something between us that smells.. *drops mic*"

"Power surge at the A/C factory... Fans shocked."

"Weird how my first 11 coffees tasted like coffee but the 12th one tastes like I'm having a stroke."

"I lose my White friends in the snow, I lose my Black friends at night, I lose my Asian friends in the sand, where do I lose my Arab friends? In an explosion."

"Yeah that chicken's free range. I just freed that shit onto my range. Some in the oven too."