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Joke of the Day

"Two cannibals are stewing up a clown One turns to the other and says, ""Does this taste funny to you?"""

"What did the math text book say to the Shakespeare text book? Look, buddy, I've already got a lot of problems, and I really don't need any of your drama."

"The sushi at my local deli is to die of."

"Why did Regina George's dog only play keep-away? because fetch is not going to happen."

"For the New Year, I vow to take a selfie at 720p.m. It's a decent resolution."

"I'm what you might call 'internet pretty', meaning I'm really your dad."

"There are 10 different kinds of people... Those who understand binary, and those who don't."

"Heading out for drinks, bail money's on top of the fridge."

"Who invented cereals? Chris P."

"How does a physicist exercise? By pumping ion!"