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Joke of the Day

"*tosses banana peel out the window during a police chase*"

"Told my girlfriend to watch out! It might smell in the bathroom... She asked if I had used the air freshener. ""yeah, I did"" ""Oh so it smells like shitrus."" man she's funny."

"What's it called when it's 9:20am and you can't wait for dinner? Oh, it's called fat. Nevermind."

"My wife likes to look at my face while we have sex. So i gave her a picture of me for when she goes out."

"Be back in a few days. Gotta shave my legs for spring. But, before I go, what's the best way to sharpen hedge trimmers?"

"What type of condoms does Ronald McDonald use? McRibbed"

"God took a paternity test He found out he was the father, the son and the holy spirit."

"I got fired from my job at the Orange Juice factory They said I couldn't concentrate"

"Remember when there were backyard gardens? Oh, those were good thymes."

"I started chewing nicotine gum the other day. I don't smoke, but I gradually want to start. =)"