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Joke of the Day
"How do you measure a great misunderstanding? In kiloWats"
Next Joke
"The asterisk was invented by someone seeing a cat's butt and thinking that it would make a great punctuation mark. It was almost a catastrophe."
"If old people are so wise... How come they always die before everyone else?"
"My girlfriend told me that my dick is two inches bigger than her ex's. And that is why she will never go back into a lesbian relationship."
"How do call an idiot that has an assault rifle pointed at you? Sir."
"Anyone wanna buy any budgies? I've got two round the house going cheep!"
"If you don't get sarcasm, follow these simple steps that will definitely help you understand it easily: Die."
"Why do women fake orgasms? Because they think we give a shit."
"[catches spider in a glass] spider: omg are you going to drink me? me: oh no this is just to take you outside spider: me: spider: drink me"
"I never know what to do when someone tries to fist bump me, so I just slowly put their fist in my mouth"