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Joke of the Day

"Question: What river separates China and India? Answer: the Fraser River (which separates Richmond and Surrey)"

"Bernie Sanders is such a socialist... ...he gave Hillary Clinton half the votes in Iowa."

"What's the difference between a Greyhound terminal in New Jersey and a voluptuous lobster? One's a crusty bus station, the other is a busty crustacean"

"Women and rocks are a lot alike. We skip the flat ones."

"""So where are you from?"" - I'm a Liberian ""Oh sorry *whispers* where are you from?"""

"Yo you guys ever try hanging out with people you like who also like you? Shit's dank af"

"What's gonna happen if Hilary Clinton gets elected as President. The kitchen staff are gonna wonder why she's missing."

"Setting a dowry for my teenage daughter. So far I've got 2 dogs, 1 little sister and an ant farm. Act before midnight, I'll toss in an iPad."

"I came across something really weird last night... I think she was half-goat or something?"

"Why did the naughty child not get electrocuted when he stuck a fork in the socket? Because he was grounded! (I'll see myself out)"