100878

Joke of the Day

"You know what is ironic about Whitney Houston dying in her bath tub? She was taking swimming lessons at that time"

"A husband says to his wife... ""What would you do if I won the lottery?"". She replied ""I'd take half, then leave you."" ""Excellent!"", he retorted, ""I won 12, here's 6, now fuck off""."

"A guy laughed at me because I only have a 19"" TV. I suggested we not laugh about how many inches things are. That shut him up."

"What do you call a lot of cactus? A cac-ton"

"Q: What do you get when you cross a pond and a stream? A: Wet feet."

"Which is the only day you are safe in a cannibal village? Sitterdays (when they eat the baby-sitter instead)."

"I was having sex with a woman when her husband came early. Premature ejaculation is killing our sex life."

"we are young, we can do what we want, we can party all night, we can kill a guy"

"*wind starts wearimg sunglases adn 90s clothes* *wind starts recitimg will smith raps* wow this is som realy fresh air"

"Women are like condoms They spend more time in your wallet than on your dick."