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Joke of the Day

"*wind starts wearimg sunglases adn 90s clothes* *wind starts recitimg will smith raps* wow this is som realy fresh air"

"What we all have in common is how extra stupid we look when we stop everything and focus on removing a stray hair from our tongue."

"It's hard dating with OCD... ...every time my girlfriend gets turned on, I have to turn her off again."

"If I ever only have 3 months to live, I want my ex wife to be with me. That would be the longest 3 months of my life."

"Reasons he didn't text you: - He forgot. - He fell asleep. - His phone died. - His pet died. - His GF died. - He died. - He thinks you died."

"I went to the zoo yesterday and saw a baguette in a cage... The zookeeper told me it was bread in captivity."

"What's the difference between E.T and illegal immigrants? E.T actually learned English and wanted to go home."

"Q: Have you seen the new Barbie Doctor doll? A: You wind her up, and she operates on batteries."

"What do you call a beautiful woman on the arm of a banjo player? A tattoo."

"Jewish having a hard time concentrating Go join a concentration camp"