100710

Joke of the Day

"[Bar] ""What'll you have"" Scotch ""You want it neat"" No thanks *bartender throws some crumbs and hair in my whisky* Thanks"

"Careers Advisor to American student: ""What do you want to be when you leave college?"" Student: ""Alive""."

"What do you call it when a psychic midget escape from prison? A small medium at large"

"You know your life sucks when... Your job sucks, Your kids suck, And your wife doesn't."

"I was so hungry this morning I almost ate a clock.... I didn't because it's time consuming. Also, I'd have to go back for seconds. I'm here all day.."

"What is the hardest thing about eating a vegetable? Getting her back into the wheelchair."

"I don't see why people dislike racial diversity I'm getting bored of watching the 100 meter dash."

"Why do doctors spank babies when they are first born? The penises fall off the dumb ones."

"What kind of music do cows listen to? (dadjoke) MOOOOOsic."

"Did you hear about that guy named Reginald who often visited his local supermarket? Indeed, he was a **reg**ular customer."