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Joke of the Day

"What did the headlines read after the midget fortune-teller escaped from jail? Small medium at large."

"You should always stay the night with a farmer's daughter... Their morning routine begins with a cock in their ear."

"Why are fish so thin? Because they eat fish!"

"What type of tree doesn't remove active torrents? A *Cedar* tree."

"I'm tired of seeing ""Hey OP, I banged your mom"" comments every time I post a submission.... I never should have given dad my username."

"Everybody knows that door handles spread disease but when I started a business to clean them and called it Knob Jobs all I got were creepy phone calls."

"I had a friend from North Korea. When I asked him how the country was, he said, ""I can't complain..."""

"My waiter asked, ""would you like sour cream, bacon and chives on your potato?"" ""That's a loaded question."""

"Bay: come over Me: no, I'm watching TMNT Bay: I made one too Me: but it's awful Bay: come watch it Me: who gave you my number, Michael"

"Did you know that Matthew Broderick was the first Iron Man in the movies? He was Ferrous Bueller."