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Joke of the Day
"Two flies are sitting on a toilet. One gets pissed off."
Next Joke
"if you don't appreciate Dwayne ""The Rock"" Johnson, I guess you could say you're taking him for granite. thanks & God bless"
"Happy new year everyone! Sorry, I'm a premature congratulator."
"I don't care about Disney lying about my Prince Charming. I'm more pissed about forest creatures and their unwillingness to clean my house."
"Paris attack I beat the paris mission in mw3 today"
"[Job Interview] HR : What do you consider your biggest weakness? Me : (pulls out machete) *whispers under my breath ""I can't forgive people"""
"When you whistle at a bird, it's as offensive to them as saying ""ching chong ding dong"" to a Chinese person."
"Hockey fights are cool but imagine the make up sex afterwards in the locker room."
"What was the other reindeer's name? Olive. EDIT: Please don't explain and let those suffer who don't understand"
"When Siri has her period she uses an iPad. I hate myself."