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Joke of the Day

"A model train set is the male equivalent of 25 cats."

"Nobody in Yemen likes the Flintstones. Which is funny, because people of Abu Dhabi do."

"Erlich Bachman. This is you as a old mayn. I'm a ugly and dead, alone."

"What's the difference between a thief and a pervert? A thief ~~steals~~ snatches your watch, a pervert watches your snatch. EDIT: I've done fucked it up."

"What did the blind paraplegic child get for Christmas? Cancer. Happy new years folks!"

"I've even started lying about my age on the treadmill at the gym."

"How did Kim Kardashian get her hands on Liberace's bath robe? #GrammysRedCarpet"

"Maybe Hitler became evil because he was mad that after so many years of lifting his hand nobody high fived him."

"Did you hear the library at the University of Alabama burned down this morning? All three books were destroyed. One of them wasn't even colored in yet."

"What do ghosts use to phone home? A terror-phone."