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Joke of the Day

"My lizards won't mate... Must be a reptile dysfunction."

"What do liberals and homeless people have in common? They are always asking for change."

"Studies show ""not jokes"" are coming back and are likely to be funnier than ever. Not."

"Found my son and his GF naked in his room, Sex-ED is so advanced. Now, they also give homework!"

"At what age do you think it's appropriate... ...to tell a highway it's adopted?"

"I ate 2 pieces of string... When they came out they were tied together. I shit you knot."

"Two Muslim vampires are discussing the weather... Vampire 1: It's really Sunni outside. Vampire 2: Shiite! Courtesy of my 8-year-old."

"Kylo Ren: Hey, why is my paycheck so low? General Hux: Damages. Maybe you should stop throwing temper tantrums with your lightsaber."

"What do you call the facility where they make lower quality, but still acceptable, goods? The satisfactory."

"did you hear about the constipated mathematician? he worked it out with a pencil.... a number two pencil"