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Joke of the Day

"Girls can be so ungrateful sometimes... I made breakfast in bed for her and instead of saying ""Thank you"", she was all shouty like ""How the hell did you get in my house...?"""

"Just overheard the gentleman in the next stall whisper ""get out of me"" and then start to cry. God I hate the Olive Garden."

"I like my women how I like my coffee.. Mugged"

"When I die, I would like to go peacefully, in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming and yelling like the passenger in his car."

"if you can't put two and two together you might actually enjoy the plot of the new star wars movie"

"Of course my clothes are on the floor. I'm a guy, that's where I hang them."

"What song should you sing to a wildebeest on his birthday? ""Happy Birthday To Gnu!"""

"Cat Joke just kitten."

"The internet is a place where you can make long-lasting friendships. You can also watch 2 girls drink diarrhea. Two sides to every coin."

"If you want to have sex with a frog, use a condom If you want to enjoy it, rib it"