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Joke of the Day

"A crazy girlfriend is like a box chocolates, They will both kill your dog."

"How did Canada name their country? They picked random letters from a hat. C, eh? N, eh? D, eh?"

"When you see geese flying in V formation, have you ever noticed that one side of the V is longer than the other? Well, there's a reason for that. There are more geese on that side."

"My Girlfriend wanted a cat. I didn't want a cat. So we compromised and we got a cat..."

"I have a friend who says he's a pothead but only takes one hit and then he's stoned. He's not a pothead, he's a mari-wanna be."

"Putting my grades up for adoption... Because I can't raise them."

"I'm suprised that there aren't more fat lesbians... All they ever talk about is eating out."

"If three Florida State football players are in the same car, who is driving? The police officer."

"Politicians are like Sperm One in a million turn out to be an actual human being"

"I do this cool trick when you introduce yourself where I concentrate on literally anything else in the universe except your name."