198630

Joke of the Day

"I have a friend who says he's a pothead but only takes one hit and then he's stoned. He's not a pothead, he's a mari-wanna be."

"Why are most weather forecasters men? Because when they promise a foot, you know you're only getting three inches."

"Dyslexic zombies crave Brians."

"What doesn't kill you leaves you feeling rejected and wondering why you weren't good enough for death."

"Does anyone know how to save your game on twitter I've been playing for 2 years straight my mom is pissed"

"It would have been way more anticlimactic if the video game had been called ""Where in the World is Carmen? San Diego."""

"Imagine my surprise when I found out ""restraining order"" did not mean she wanted me to tie her up."

"Why was the Windows PC broke? It ran out of cache."

"Why do Australians take forever to play chess? Because they never make it past the first check, mate."

"Q: What do you have with Dick Cheney, Dick Morris, and Dick Nixon in the same room? NSFW A: Way too much cock and bull."