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Joke of the Day

"What do my wife and a chest freezer have in common? The exterior is hot, but its cold as ice inside."

"A joke is a lot like a dick A feminist cant take either"

"Whenever I have a one night stand, I always use protection.. A fake name and a fake number."

"What kind of magic does a love-struck giraffe practice? Neck-romance-y."

"As a girl who grew up with an annoying little sister the most unrealistic thing about Frozen is how Elsa never tried to kill Anna on purpose"

"""prepare for battle"" they said Yet they didnt prepare themselves"

"That moment when the music stops playing at the gym and the whole room sounds like gay porn."

"Q: What happened when the dog went to the flea circus? - A: It stole the show!"

"Whenever I get a stack of resumes, I immediately throw half of them away. I don't want unlucky people working in my department."

"Stalin took from the rich and gave it to the poor... ... and then he took both of them and put them into the Gulag for 25 years. EDIT: spelling"