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Joke of the Day
"What do you call a man with a spade in his head? Doug."
Next Joke
"I donate blood 5 times a year just so I'm less and less related to some of my relatives."
"I forgot Rhianna's ex-boyfriend's name...then it hit me."
"[tv interview] I'm with Amy. Her house was damaged by the floods, how are you? [cut to Amy crying] MORE LIQUID IS THE LAST THING WE NEED AMY"
"What's ISIS's favorite Country Band? Allahbama"
"Wow, you're a Sagittarius?? That must mean you're trusting, passionate and thick as pig shit to think I care about horoscopes"
"I once thought I had a Japanese friend. But it was just my imagine Asian."
"Why do blonds have schools underwater. Because deep down, they're not so stupid."
"Why shouldn't you get asylum in Russia? Cuz you'd be snowed-in"
"Oscar Pistorius was released from jail into his uncles custody I heard his uncles shitting himself, safer than using the toilet"