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Joke of the Day

"I'm unsure how I feel about my new mirror... ...I just haven't had time to reflect yet. www.ChippedBeefOnToast.com"

"Scientist have created five monkeys with autism. They were promptly made mods of r/jokes"

"This chic on Facebook said she ran 17 miles yesterday. Where I live the police would have gave up after like, IDK, 6 miles maybe."

"Spent morning at the farmers market carefully selecting fruits and vegetables to throw away next Saturday."

"A Mexican has 2 kids. He names the first one Jose. What did he name the other? Hose B"

"What do you call a dog with no legs It doesn't matter. He won't come anyway."

"Gotta be careful. My astrologer just warned me someone pretending to predict the future would steal my money."

"The tennis factory near me got closed down after local residents complained... Apparently they were making a racquet."

"My driver's license says I'm an organ donor but jokes on them because I have a piano."

"What do you call a pony with a sore throat? A hoarse horse!"