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Joke of the Day
"So I broke my mom's tailbone during childbirth. And I've been a pain in her ass ever since."
Next Joke
"3 unwritten rules of life: 1. 2. 3."
"Went to a KKK meeting the other day... It was a load of white sheet."
"I'd never let my kids watch an orchestral performance. Too much sax and violins."
"I've decided I'll never get down to my original weight I'm okay with that. After all, 6lbs, 3oz, is just not realistic."
"""You're odd"" she said. ""Not even"" I replied."
"Why are men typically smarter than women? They come across more things."
"What do you call ten sets of bagpipes at the bottom of the sea? A start."
"How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb? nobody ever changed that light bulb because we are to fat and lazy to do it"
"Never sky dived before, but I just zoomed google maps way too fast. Pure adrenaline."