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Joke of the Day

"How many Americans does it take to change a light bulb? nobody ever changed that light bulb because we are to fat and lazy to do it"

"Can anyone recommend a good movie to kinda listen to while I stare at my phone?"

"What do you call an anorexic person with a yeast infection? A quarter-pounder with cheese."

"My teacher took off points when I spilled my juice on my Calculus homework... ... Apparently, I shouldn't drink and derive."

"How many French words has the Turkish language recently adopted? Beaucoup."

"Why is that Mac owners always say their computers never get viruses... ...when it is clear that being a pretentious douche is a clear example of a virus that is exclusive to Mac ownership?"

"Fails drug test. Adds ""Positive"" Person to resume."

"What do you call the stupidest fish in the sea? A dumb bass."

"But do you know what 6.9 is? A good thing screwed up by a period."

"A spider crawled into my keyboard earlier. It's okay, I've got him under Ctrl."