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Joke of the Day

"This Mother's Day, my dad got a new car for my mom. He said it was the best trade he's ever made"

"My wife and I have a new arrangement. I can sleep with any woman I want, but she doesn't speak to me or live with me anymore."

"don't eat yellow snow is a pretty sound rule but i would warn against eating any kind of weather"

"Light a man a fire and you warm him for a night... Light that man on fire and you'll warm him for the rest of his life."

"I could talk about the atomic structure all day... But I'd rather not Bohr you about it."

"My 2 year old loves Hello Kitty. My 6 month old, on the other hand, is really into Hello Titty."

"Just heard someone screaming outside and my instinct was to turn up the TV. Whatever the opposite of a superhero is, I'm that."

"My Father said: do unto others as you would have them do unto you.' So I sent him to a girls boarding school in France."

"What is a King's favourite piece of Golf Equipment? His Royal Tee"

"Serious question: Are doctors SURE erectile dysfunction isn't just a side effect of being married & bangin the same woman for years & years?"