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Joke of the Day

"What do Hurricane Irene and Kim Kardashian have in common? They blow the whole east coast and there's videos online."

"I can build things out of wood. Canoe?"

"I'm a Buddhist pothead so I hope I'm reincarnated as a horse so I can come back and eat grass all day."

"How many Millennials does it take to change a light bulb? None! We don't change light bulbs. We disrupt them."

"What's the best part about getting AIDS You can only catch it once."

"I'm tired and want to sleep, but I can't stop imagining how the whole scenario of the first person to pee on a jellyfish sting went down"

"What did the flower couple call their two babies? Poli, Nate"

"Every time I use <3 in an @ to someone, I can't help but think, ""Please accept this carrot with balls as a token of how much I heart you."""

"YOU make some noise. You're the one with the band and the microphone."