97021

Joke of the Day

"Honey, your skirt is so short that your STD is showing."

"Pokemon Go has taught us that there's a disturbing number of dead bodies just laying around everywhere"

"Pokemon Go goes live in Canada today You idiots."

"Pro tip for picking up girls - keep your back straight and lift with your knees."

"A pumpkin-shaped woman should never wear a bright orange top and a brown beret unless she wants to make my whole fucking day."

"How do you have a mustache without people calling it a pedophile mustache? Just have a little square under the nose."

"A city is only really home when you stop being mystified by its public transport system and instead are just constantly angry at it."

"I do feel bad for some of you who complain about all the unwanted attention you get on Twitter. Maybe you should try notepad, or word."

"Like this! How do you fuck up a joke?"

"Did you hear about the cowboy who wore a hat made of paper towels? He had a bounty on his head."