96882
Joke of the Day
"Q: Why did the farmer feed his cows money? A: He wanted rich milk."
Next Joke
"You're probably wondering how I tweet so much while maintaining a loving marriage and two amazing kids. The key is neglect."
"Rather than trying to ""change"" your passwords, accept them for their imperfections and they will grow stronger than you can possibly imagine"
"Why did the elephant paint itself lots of different colors. So that it could hide in the crayon box. Courtesy of my 4 y/o niece."
"I just had some mediocre chinese food ... it was Tso Tso"
"When I was in 3rd grade my teacher smoking in the classroom told us not to tell well I'm telling you now"
"A member of ISIS accidentally blew himself up... Well, Ji-had it coming."
"""Let's get this show on the road."" ~ Guy who invented parades"
"How To Impress Your Boss 1. Show up early. 2. Have all the tools you need. 3. Read the strategy guide. 4. Aim for the big glowing weak spot (usually the eyes)."
"Joke comments: so you can get all your best jokes in one place. Put jokes in comments!"