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Joke of the Day
"""Let's get this show on the road."" ~ Guy who invented parades"
Next Joke
"Every single time I give my heart to a girl... She Brexit."
"How I fall asleep People get jealous of me because of how fast I fall asleep so I'm going to share my secret. First of all, ally you have to do is close your ey..."
"What's the difference between a hobo crack addict and a millionaire crack addict? 99 dollars."
"nothing is more unattractive than insecurity unless that doesnt sound right haha i mean whatever you guys think"
"I am absolutely mortified right now. I sent someone a DM to my small business center and TinyURL shortened it to http://tinyurl.com/acockk"
"what is the best way to smuggle drugs? In your dogs asshole. Should there be border control frisking, it will be perceived as two dogs plain wolfing"
"Brother: *calls* Can you pick me up at the airport tomorrow? Me: Sure. Can't wait to see you. Him: I land at 5 AM. Me: I have no brother."
"New warning label: Quitting cigarettes significantly increases the amount of money you will have for pot."
"It sucks how pizza doesn't grow back."