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Joke of the Day

"Somebody needs to wake up Green Day It's October 1st"

"I thought I really understood what I was thinking, and then I spoke."

"I got my haircut the other day... ...and I just saw my barber at the grocery. He asked how I liked my haircut. I told him I didn't like it at first, but its growing on me."

"What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming up over the hill? ""Here come the elephants up over the hill!"""

"HR: You know why you're here? Me: So we can be alone? HR: Your new nickname is a problem. Me: We all have them. HR: Yes, but Sperminator?"

"Why are there no female necrophiliacs? Because dead guys can't spend money."

"Why can't americans play LoL? They can't guard their towers."

"OC why do doctors check their patients reflexes? Because they get a kick out of it"

"Somebody asked me what a spoonerism was.... I haven't got a cooking flue."

"What's the difference between a 4 year old boy and a bag of cocaine? Eric Clapton wouldn't let a bag of cocaine fall out a window."