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Joke of the Day
"Why did the cynic fall asleep? Because he had a bed day."
Next Joke
"I got the chance to watch a women's final for beach volleyball last night... What a semi!!"
"What's a catalyst? It's how a farmer keeps track of his cows."
"However lonely you feel, you're never alone. There are literally millions of bugs, mites and bacteria living in your house. Goodnight."
"I point my gun at the bank teller and order him to fill my bag with cash but he struggles because the bag is already full of tacos."
"""Pistorius"" sounds like a spell Harry Potter would use to make someone's legs disappear That's a Frankie Boyle joke"
"My wife has cancer and the doctor has prescribed heavy morphine doses for the pain and distress. It works, when I have taken them I can hardly hear her crying at all."
"How many libertarians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, the lightbulb has to pull itself up by the bootstraps and screw itself in"
"Fun Fact: Organic milk only comes from cows that do yoga and moo about being a vegetarian or marathons they were in."
"Not trying to be racist or ignorant but... seriously, all crocodiles and alligators look alike."