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Joke of the Day

"The contents of my son's last diaper was so upsetting to both of us we shared a cigarette after I changed it."

Next Joke
 
"Paul Walker was in Eight Below... ...and now, he's six below."
"I got fired from my job at the pasta factory after a fusilli mistakes."
"Girls are so confusing She said ""don't stop"" and now I'm in jail."
"Old enough -Mom I'm finally 15, can I have a boyfriend? -No. -Can I use high Heels? -No. -Can I use a mini skirt? -No. -But why? -Because you're a man, Bob."
"Give me a massage ""Mm okay"" *rubs oil all over her* *things get hot* *things get too hot* *she bursts into flames* ""Dang I used petroleum"""
"[first date] ME: one of my biggest pet peeves is people who think the world revolves around them MY DATE, WHO IS THE SUN: i see"
"What idiot decided it should be my foot's asleep instead of coma toes?"
"What sock do you put on last? The one that's left."
"/r/jokes/ wins Friend of the Planet award! for 95.001% recycled content."