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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when a Game of Thrones character sets up your photo studio? Stark lighting."

"A pirate crew is fleeing from a whaling ship One pirate swabbie asks, ""This be the whaling ship driven by the wench with two vaginas?"" The pirate says, ""Aye, we best be wary of har poons."""

"[driving 2 school] *looks back,sees toothbrushes in child carseats WAIT! IF YOU'RE HERE THEN... [cut to kids at home, covered in toothpaste]"

"The England team visited an orphanage in Brazil today. ""It's heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope"" said Jose, age 6."

"It'd be pretty messed up if the cure for cancer was in those end-slices of bread."

"I opened my fortune-cookie. There was nothing inside. Does that mean i have no future?"

"i appreciate the song ""the boys are back in town"" because it answers the age-old question: are the boys back in town y/n?"

"Twitter is considering a 10,000-character limit for tweets. Well, there goes the neighborhood."

"HE: Look My Sweety, a star is falling.... Make a wish quick!!! SHE: To Get Married with you my love <3 He: Ohh Sweetheart... I think that was just an airplane light :D"

"Whats the difference between a rooster and a prostitute? One goes ""cockadoodle doo"", the other goes, ""Any cock 'ill do."" Old joke my 60-something grandfather told me when I was 10"