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Joke of the Day

"HE: Look My Sweety, a star is falling.... Make a wish quick!!! SHE: To Get Married with you my love <3 He: Ohh Sweetheart... I think that was just an airplane light :D"

"""Oh Shit, Was That Today?"" an autobiography"

"Which of the following words does not belong: meat, eggs, wife, blowjob? Blowjob. You can beat your meat, eggs, and wife; but you can't beat a blowjob."

"Why didn't Rose get an iPhone 7? She never let go, Jack."

"Did you hear about the ex-porn star who got fired from the gas station? Every time he got close to filling the tank, he'd pull the nozzle out and spray gasoline all over the car."

"What did the judge order in his whiskey? Just ice"

"What do you call a pig that votes? Polled pork."

"This outfit is called Running Into Someone I Know Would Be The Ultimate Worst Thing That Could Happen"

"The shortest sentence in the English language is ""go."" What is the longest? Life without parole"

"What's a Pedophile's Favorite Part about Hockey? Getting there before the first period."