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Joke of the Day

"Fucking in lifts is wrong on so many levels"

"What does a brick and your mom have in common? They are both flat-chested and laid by Mexicans. Source: My old middle school."

"HOW TO ROB A BANK: (1) Walk in and start talking about your study abroad experience. (2) Everyone's asleep now. Grab the money."

"All right stop, coagulate and thicken"

"Women need to relax and stop worrying so much about their bodies. Men aren't picky! Unless you're chubby or have a wrinkle or something."

"Why did Jesus stop playing Hockey? He just kept getting nailed to the boards. Sorry too anyone offended, but come on, why are you here if you get offended. PS, Sorry Jesus, its funny!"

"There something bugging me. I've encountered this object many times over in the streets lately. Every way I turn I see Weed.... les"

"How did the toad feel in the morning? A little bit froggy"

"So, my feminist cousin is diabetic and recently, her legs were amputated... ...safe to say, she won't be jumping to conclusions anytime soon."

"What is the greatest intermolecular force of all time? Dipole, dipole, dipole, dipole, and dipole!"